So, I was reading my last couple of posts and realized that they are more or less condensed narratives of what has been happening. In other words they are pretty boring. Right now I’m feeling really boring. I should be out skiing before and after work, yet I’m doing neither. Mari’s gone the weather kinda sucks and I can’t wait to not have to go into work. Anyway, I went skiing with Mak the other day and then we spent my applebees gift card on a late lunch. At lunch we got to talking, or I got to talking… whatever.
Anyway, I got to talking about my job and how it sucks. To an outsider it may seem like working at a outdoor shop would be the best thing in the world. You get deals on gear, you get to talk to people all day about gear, you get to go to shows to learn about gear and you get to go to ice climbing, kayaking and skiing events where you are one of the important people. However, what you don’t realize is that all of this stuff really isn’t that much fun, and it doesn’t really require much of you.
Spending you days explaining the benefits of $20 wool socks, how something can be waterproof and breathable and helping people try on boots is a lot less fun than actually going out and using this equipment and talking about who you’re going to vote for. At the same time, because it doesn’t require much of you, you stop having to use your brain. The longer this goes on the worse it gets. I truly believe that you must keep using your brain or you will lose certain skills, your vocabulary will decrease, and things like your ability to write will decline. I used to think of myself as a pretty good writer, but now I read some things and wonder what idiot wrote this. This combined with the lack of accomplishment and the knowing that I’m not working toward anything and not developing any skills has really driven me into a state of mild depression. My decision to go back to school, I think, has really had a good effect on my mood. However, I’m not in school yet, and now while I’m at work I can’t help but count the days until I don’t have to be there.
I hope I can get out of this rut. Once my classes start I think I will be on the right track. I will be studying 2D design, editing, publication and info management and web design. On top of that I will be working with the OAP to further develop their outdoor programs, with University Communications as a student photographer, and hopefully will have the opportunity to work with University Communications on some different projects related to the degree I’m pursuing.
I need this. I need a change and a challenge. I’ve not been feeling very creative and I need to get out of my box. It’s much harder in practice than on paper. I think this is the beginning of something good. Wish me luck…